Tuesday, January 01, 2008

You say you want a resolution...

I'm not big on resolutions. I don't have any philosophical reasoning for this, but one time I heard someone say they didn't believe in resolutions, and it sounded good to me. It's kind of like if someone said they didn't believe in working. That's an ideology I think I could really get behind.

I prefer to focus on the positive, the things I did accomplish in 2007. A little affirmation, if you will. I have changed a lot over the past year. Oh sure, maybe not from outward appearances. I still live in the same place, have the same job, the same car, the same underwear rotation, etc. But look closer. Deeper.

For starters, I bathed... every day. And according to my limited research, that is more than 25% of Americans can say, a couple of whom I think I worked with.

I also got out of bed every day. This despite having no real motivation most of the time for doing so.

I threw out a bottle of ketchup... which had a 2004 expiration date on it. I wish I were making this up.

I bought girl scout cookies. Because--and some of you may not know this--I believe the children are our future. Teach them well. And let them lead the way. And also because thin mints are like getting a box of crack for under five bucks. Not that I've done crack, but I hear things.

Oh, here's a rather important one. I breathed approximately 8 million times during the past year! OK, so most of you are probably right there with me on that one. Just remember, life isn't measured by how many breaths you take, because really, who can keep track? That's why we use years.

And then there was... hmm. Well the hour is getting late. And since I can barely remember what I did Monday, much less last February, I will let my blog tell you the rest. Presenting Bone's 2007, The Year In Blog:

1. Coming out (I outed my relationship with Nan.)
2. A hat for all seasons (Axl and I, and his four hats, attended an Alabama basketball game. AKA The Mentos Incident.)
3. Nuvaring is not for everyone (I voiced my displeasure with the commercials aired during General Hospital.)
4. Do Not Open Until 2017 (I turned 34.)
5. Roast-a-Bone (There was the first ever Bone roast. Strange that this would be one of my most commented on posts ever. Hmph. Odd.)
6. How I Roll (I began a fun new blog feature about my previous rides.)
7. "You can all sleep sound tonight..." (I proposed a new ad campaign for Lysol.)
8. If they take my stapler, I'll set the building on fire (I saw Office Space for the first time! Frickin' A.)
9. Putting the fun in reFUNd (I proposed a few innovative tax code changes, which inexplicably have yet to be enacted.)
10. The fashion evolution of Bone (I admitted to once wearing Wranglers. And also proposed the outfit flow chart, which to date, hasn't become a reality. Why? No resources, no skill, no money, no time.)
11. 52:45 (I ran my second-ever 10K.)
12. Remembering Pablo (I said goodbye to Pablo...)
13. Sam (...and Sam...)
14. Will Neuter For Plinko Chips (...and Bob Barker.)
15. Nine iron over the starboard side (I rediscovered golf, and the uncanny ability to lose golf balls. It's like riding a bike.)
16. What's my age again? (I also rediscovered Nintendo...)
17. To caulk or ford? (...and the Oregon Trail...)
18. Opening up the AT40 Vault (...and Casey Kasem!!!)
19. ...But somebody's gotta do it (I pondered an exciting career change...)
20. Things that make you go hmmm, in Hazzard (...and The Dukes Of Hazzard.)
21. Sundays with Chachi (Scott Baio became my relationship mentor.)
22. The voice of a not-so-new generation (I coined the phrase The Sitcom Generation. And also the word bacheloronomics. OK, seriously, how did I have this much time?)
23. Panama City '07 (I went to the beach...)
24. Grillmaster B (...and grilled. Though not at the beach.)
25. iTunes aNonymous (I came to terms with one addiction...)
26. The Great American Coke-Out (...and tried to curb another.)
27. That 70's Fish (I said hello to GabeKaplan...)
28. Take those old movies off the shelf (...and old movies.)
29. I wiki, therefore I am (I wiki'd lots.)
30. Bone's 3rd Annual Festivus For The Rest Of Us (And of course, there was my third annual Festivus party. Next year, I plan to present the first annual Online Festivus party, so you can all air your grievances here.)

If you really want a resolution, I've always thought one of the best is just to make sure that you live every day. Laugh, cry, think, feel, see, listen. Experience life with all your senses. Savor the days with the value their brevity demands.

Thanks for stopping by during 2007. And may you have a happy and healthy 2008.

"I can't remember all the times I tried to tell myself to hold on to these moments as they pass..."


  1. In fact I am not big on resolutions either. I never made any and I am not going to start one. However, I do have goals and I try to achieve those.

    I think living and breathing is motivation enough to do anything.

    Wishing you a very Happy 2008. Hope your writing grows as never before.

  2. Happy New Year Bone. Here's to a wonderful 2008.

  3. I believe resolutions should be made, if at all, in the moment, not once a year. Not that I make any, 'cause I won't keep them. Happy New Year, Bone. If I were rolling in money (that was mine) I would buy you a Kindle -- because you should never again be without free access to Wikipedia.

  4. Happy New Year Bone, I am glad our paths crossed this year, it was a great honour and through your prompts I met many nice people...I am hoping 2008 will be wonderful for all these wonderful people including you...here's a toast to you for hosting one of my fav. sites. Thank you.

  5. Happy New Year! I like to live each day like it's New Years Day. That way resolutions are made and broken year round, not just January and March ;)

  6. the beginning of your post was so like watching Jerry! LOL!

    I tried to work on a Best of Fefyfomanna yesterday, but I just couldn't do it...DD walked in and started giving her opinion. LOL!

    Thanks for all the memories...looking forward to 2008 and more of your great wit and wisdom.

  7. Gautami: Thank you. May you achieve all your goals.

    Brian: Happy New Year to you, too.

    Marcia: I agree with your "in the moment" thinking :) I had not heard of a Kindle until now, so I googled it. That's pretty cool.

    UL: Thank you. I'm glad our paths crossed as well.

    Melanie: Happy New Year, Cheerleader. Have fun breaking those daily resolutions ;-)

    Renee: Why, thank you. He may have slightly influenced me.

    I tried to focus on significant events of the past year, but there weren't that many, so I just started putting in anything :)

  8. Every year I say I'm going to the gym more, I'm going to stop smoking (even though it's just a here and there thing), and I'm going to lose weight. You would think by now I'd be bored with these, but I'm not. I'm doing it again this year. I'll get to the gym tomorrow and just after I finish this last pack of cigarettes. Ugh.

  9. happy new year to you. hope for the best in 2008!

  10. Roast a Bone? There was a roast for Bone? Don't you want to say "one of the 10,000 most incredible bloggers I know hosted it?"

    Very glad that you showered and made it out of bed every day. Keep it up in 08

    Good blogging Bone :)

    I know your writing will blossom even more

  11. LOL! Gads Bone, you crack me up dude *wiping eyes* Especially the thin mints/crack, uh, crack. It's a little known fact, man! They are too addicting to be normal.

    I make resolutions, and I keep them *koff* most of the time. We did make some anti-resolutions over at Write Stuff if you're interested.

    Happy New Year, buddy. I hope mama Bone is feeling better and that 2008 is GRRREAT!

    Write From Karen

  12. Well you could always do Anti-Resolutions. They're a little easier to work with. And I find it interesting that you did a review. I did one also.

    Otherwise, I hope this is a great New Year for you, and I am hoping that your mother is doing well.

  13. Just take it one breath at a time!

  14. LOL, great post. I got the bathing down, and I'm working on the flossing...Happy New Year, Bone! Thanks for all the fun.

  15. Carnealian: Well as long as you're not bored. I think you can stick with them this year. Don't make me come up there :)

    Sizzle: Thank ya! And a Happy New Year to you, too.

    Pia: Don't you want to say "one of the 10,000 most incredible bloggers I know hosted it?"

    Did I not say that? That line must have gotten cut in the final editing. I know it was in there :)

    Karen: Yeah, thin mints are really dangerous. I usually eat them by the sleeve.

    I haven't heard of anti-resolutions. I'll check it out.

    Momma Bone continues to get a little better each day, I think. Thanks :)

    Square1: Thanks for the good wishes. Guess I need to see what these anti-resolutions are. May you have a wonderful new year as well.

    Kontan: I plan on it. Besides, I tried taking two breaths at once, and never could figure it out :)

    Actonbell: Good to know you got the bathing down. I'm sure those around you are appreciative, even if they don't always tell you.

  16. Happy New Year Bone :)

    Did you know that Jack is being "put off" indefinitely because of the writers strike?
    I really think you and I could write a couple of scripts and get the ball rolling over there-
    what do you think? ;)
    Bring back Michelle from the dead- (and her husband...what was his name?)
    And President Palmer is not really dead- he's just been selling insurance! lol :D
    I've been watching re-runs- and I think of you every time I do~
    Hope 2008 will be splendid for you and yours-
    hugs :)

  17. you did a lot last year and thanks for some of the chuckles you gave us (some like the outing of you and your mistress Nan brought a chuckle just seeing it mentioned). You got a creative blog, have a Happy New Year Bone.

  18. I just ordered two boxes of Thin Mints, myself...that after resolving to cut back on junk. Oh well!
    I'm glad I've had your blog this year...you've brought a smile to many of my days! :)
    Have a wonderful 2008, dear friend! :)

  19. Happy New Year, Sir Bone.

    I admit to making resolutions, but only small, realistic, attainable ones. Things like: Work out at least 10 minutes a day. Even if it's only a brisk walk around the block two or three times.

    Though, after reading this, I think perhaps I should list the things I accomplished instead of those I hope to. Too funny! I hope we all remember to savor every day for what it is.

  20. Happy New Year, Bone...I love your blog and it is a guaranteed happy place when I need to laugh out loud. You are an incredibly funny writer!! Best wishes to you in 2008. :~)

  21. Happy New Year... you so crack me up!

    I can wait for this year and all your "resolutions"...

  22. I meant "can't wait"... sorry! :)

  23. Congrats on tossing the ketchup!

  24. I have changed a lot over the past year. Oh sure, maybe not from outward appearances. I still live in the same place, have the same job, the same car, the same underwear rotation, etc. But look closer. Deeper.

    For starters, I bathed... every day.

    Was bathing daily a big change from 2006? Really? Congratulations on such a monumental step towards improving yourself! Woohoo!


    Have a great 2008, Bone. Prospero año nuevo…

  25. And a very HNY to you too babe. Love your 2007 year in review and hope to read you for eons to come! :)


  26. Try circular breathing ;-)

  27. I started this year with seven serious resolutions and seven fun. We'll have to wait and see how they turn out. Loved your look back on 2007. Hope everything is well with Mama Bone and yourself. Have a happy new year. Good night.

  28. Almost forgot! I wanted to say thank you for 3WW because I got to meet you and so many other nice people. Thanks~

  29. Gosh you are a riot...

    Ok first I like new years not for 'resolutions' as much as for taking the time to reflect on the direction life is heading... coming up with goals... yea, sure exercising and losing weight are ALWAYS on that list, but frankly they need to be addressed at least once a year doncha think! hehehe

    Going through your list of accomplishments... you have had a good year... clean lol ... full of opinions, adventures and friendships... even a race! (I might add that you did 5k more than me in about 15 minutes extra! show off!*wink) And while we are on the 'rub it in' bit of your post... You are ONLY 34?????!!!!! I was 34... once! lol

    Anyway, I am glad I have had the opportunity to connect here with you bone and learn a little about your life. You are such a positive energy force!


  30. I am truly dumb. Was reading this as I need a laugh and realized that not only was it a list of Bone's greatest achievements, it was Bone's favorite posts of 07

    Signed: a fan of GabeKaplan, but you can call me_______Oh right, a fan of Bone's also

  31. Mayden: Happy new year! (Wow, I'm behind on answering comments.) No, I didn't know that about Jack, but I was wondering how that would work.

    Sage: Thanks, Sage. I'm glad a few of the posts are memorable.

    Jennifer: You mean Thin Mints aren't healthy? I'll pretend I didn't hear that :) And thank you.

    Lillith: Some people choose to live in the future. I choose to live in the past :)

    Fledgling: Thank you for the kind words. I'm glad you enjoy my writings :)

    Hotpinksox: You can say that again.

    Shayna: Haha. I think "can wait" was funnier :) Happy new year to you.

    OK Chick: Thanks. I guess it's better than tossing the cookies.

    TC: Haha. I would say no, but then I don't remember much about 2006, so perhaps :)

    Y prospero ano nuevo a ti. (I first had prospero un ano. Don't ask what that means. Just... don't.)

    Circe: HNY to you, my dear. Looking forward to the eons.

    Kontan: I'll google it :)

    Michelle: Thank you. And 3WW has turned out better than I could have ever anticipated.

    Kate: Aww, I'm glad I'm a positive energy force. Thank you. That means a lot, Kate. I'm glad we've "connected" here, too.

    Anonymous: Yes, it pretty much was Bone's favorite posts. Many of them, anyway.