Friday, October 22, 2004

Look away! I'm hideous!

Gene Stallings was just on Paul Finebaum. I can't pick it up in here because it's a weak AM station, so I had to go out to my truck and listen to it. Good stuff.

Seinfeld Trivia
What religion did George convert to for a woman?

Yesterday's answer was indeed head patting. Before mingling at a party, Jerry suggested to Elaine that they come up with a signal in case one of them got into a bad conversation, the other would see it and come bail them out. ("The Stranded")

I got the last name
Went to eat last night. Sat with a very hot server. Well, I got to noticing on the check that it had her first name and the first three letters of her last name. So I said something to her and she smiled. So when she brought the checks, she pointed to mine and was like, "There, I finished it for you." She had spelled out the rest of her last name. Does that mean anything? Probably not. I thought about writing down the area code and seeing if she'd finish her phone number as well. But I thought it would be safer to just smile a goofy smile, leave a 30% tip, and exit quickly. I kinda felt like George when he found out Kramer's first name was Cosmo... or even better than that. Or something.

Bizarro Great American Smokeout
Also shot some pool last night. There were lots of hotties up there. It also got really smoky in there. It reminded me of the Seinfeld where Kramer invites smokers into his apartment:
J: "What happened to your face? It looks like an old catcher's mitt."
K: "My face is all craggly. It's crinkly."
J: "It's from all that smoke. You've experienced a lifetime of smoking in 72 hours. What did you expect?"
K: "Emphysema, birth defects, cancer. But not this. Jerry, my face is my livelihood. Everything I have I owe to this face."
J: "And your teeth, your teeth are all brown."
K: "Look away, I'm hideous!"

No, it's not a new hormone pill. It stands for hot water heater. The guy came and installed a new one yesterday afternoon. So the leak is fixed, however, the extra room still smells like a vomitorium. I gotta rent a carpet shampooer or something. (Shampooer? That's a funny word.)

Off day
I took off work today. I set no alarm clocks last night and didn't open my eyes until 11:30 today. Clearly, I needed some rest. Here's something odd: I took off work Friday, October 24th, last year, which was also the Friday before the Alabama/Tennessee game. What is up with that? Must be something with my cycles. (What?) Maybe I just get burned out every year about this same time. I have also noticed that I don't think I have had a girlfriend on Halloween for like the past 3 or 4 years. Seems like relationships tend to end late summer/early fall for me. The important thing is that I learned something... or very little.

"We didn't do anything to freak her out on the 4th of July.... unless you did something before I got there."

"So why didn't anything ever happen between the two of you?"
"Well, for one thing, she's 21 and still lives at home..."

"She probably has a boyfriend."
"Yeah, probably. There's only one way to find out... and I don't know it."

"You walk before me, lord knows I can't follow. You walk behind me, and I don't think I can lead. You walk around me. Please don't walk around me, cos you know how dizzy I get..."


  1. "I have also noticed that I don't think I have had a girlfriend on Halloween for like the past 3 or 4 years."
    Wait a minute, I thought you had a girlfriend? What happened Bone?
    -Sara =/

  2. Good question. I'm not sure I ever know for sure what happens ;-)