Wednesday, October 11, 2006

Three Word Wednesday #5

Each week, I will post three (or more) random words. Your mission, should you choose to accept it, is to write something using all of those words. It can be a few lines, a story, a poem, anything. Don't spend too much time on it. It doesn't have to be perfect. The idea is to let your mind wander and write what it will. I'll also write something using the same three words.

Be sure to leave a comment if you participate.

This week's words are:
throat
knees
tears


What's that pain in my chest? Why won't it stop? I can feel my pulse. It's right there at my heart. It's gotta be my heart. Stop. Why won't it stop?! OK. Relax. If I turn over on my back, it'll stop. It's just how I'm lying.

No. Still there. Think about something else. The football game. We won. That's good. It's not working. How can I not think about this pain in my chest? What if I'm having a heart attack? I eat fast food every meal. Maybe it's a small one. I've heard of those. Like earthquakes. You don't even realize you're having one. And then it's gone.

Why won't it stop? Pulsing. Hurting. What if it's an aneurysm? Maybe I should call someone. It's midnight. They'll think I'm crazy. But what if it is an aneurysm? And I die. And they find me in two or three days.

I should write a note. Yes, that's it. I can write a note explaining that I think I'm having an aneurysm. And I can say all the things I've always wanted to say. And then if they find me, they'll know how I felt. Mom. Dad. My sister. My friends. And if it's not an aneurysm, then I can throw it away in the morning.

No, that's stupid! Who writes a note for something like this? Who would even think of such a thing. What is wrong with me? But something is. People don't just have pains do they? Or maybe they do. Maybe this is normal. Or maybe it's not.

Maybe it's something serious. I have pains in my head all the time. What if I have a tumor? I don't want to know. What if they tell me I have two weeks to live? I'm not going to the doctor. If I don't go, nothing will happen.

I'm not ready to die. God, please. I'm not ready. I'm young. I know I haven't lived the best. But I'm not ready. For eternity. It never ends. How can that be? Forever and ever and ever and ever with no end. I can't think about that. It drives me crazy. But it's coming. There's no way out. Once you're born, you're here, somewhere, forever!

I have to get up. I scream. I walk around the room. My throat is dry. I go downstairs and get some water. It doesn't phase my parched throat. I get on my knees. God, please. I'm in tears. Please. Let me live a normal life. Just thirty more years. That's not much. That's not even average. Just to 63.

What if it's cancer? My parents never had cancer. Why should I? Why can't I live to my mid-50's with no serious problems like them? Something is wrong with me. Why do I have these little pains? I have to sleep. I have to forget this. What is wrong with me?

"Bouts of fear permeate all I see. Heightening nervousness threatens me. I am paralyzed. So afraid to die..."

12 comments:

  1. This happened to me. It was a displaced rib.

    It was frightening in exactly that way, except for the eternity thing. That's no sweat for me. I believe we have always been, not that we just started here. Just eternal beings having an earthly experience. It would scare me to leave without people really knowing my heart though.

    My exercise is done and posted. This is the second post where we've used the word "tears". Hmmm.

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  2. Well written! But I don't like the subject matter. I got a knot in my tummy reading it. Yikes!!!

    I love that song! Were you trying to ask me a question I should say, "YES!" to? lol

    The cat got the mouse. Read about it on my blog page.

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  3. I watched you walk away and I couldn't stop you. Through my tears I tried to make you see you were what I wanted. If I could form the words I would scream "Don't leave me! Don't you see you're what I want!" But the words won't come because of the tightness in my throat. You don't look back and I fall to my knees knowing my chance is gone.

    Boy that was sad, huh?

    Let me try again...

    I get weak when you grab me so tightly by my throat, I can't stop the tears as you force me to my knees but yet, I've never wanted you more.

    What's with all the darkness? Yikes! I need to laugh! Lighten up!

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  4. Powerful Entry. I'll give this a try!


    I'm down on bended knee
    with a lump in my throat
    It so hard for me to speak
    Please don?t think I?m weak
    I?m pleading for your forgives
    Tears fall like rain
    Yesterday we shared a life together
    Today we are like strangers in a strange land
    I guess nothing lasts forever
    If tomorrow, we should walk down separate roads
    Know that I never wanted to flee
    I was just too blind to see that you really did love me

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  5. Opps that should be forgiveness. I hate mistypes and what is with blogger putting in question marks where my apostrophes go?

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  6. Freaky. Beautifully written, but scary. I, too, could feel my stomach in my throat.

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  7. You took three great words and wrote that?

    It's very well written but you are such a frigging hypochandriac
    I sense that you want sympathy.


    Sorry--the part about leaving a note about the aneurysm is hysterical. Don't think people who have them have time to

    Couldn't stop laughing. Really hope that you were going for humor

    A lot of people write letters to family while still alive, young and kicking telling them how they feel

    Sorry Bone, not letting you get away with this. Unless you have turned anti-romantic

    This was supposed to be funny, right?

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  8. Well Pia already said it, but you are quite the hypochondriac. Anyway, as always, your writing is a killer. Pun inteded...so, very intended. ;-)

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  9. Dorothy: I didn't even realize we'd done tears before, but you're right, we have. I'll try to keep better track of that in the future and ask for new words if we've done them before.

    Hotpinksox: I was surprised to see it. Not a lot of people know it.

    I love your mouse picture. Be sure to reward your cat.

    Stace: I like the second one best. I took it to be a bit suggestive. But that could just be me. lol Thanks for participating.

    Rose: I'm not sure what's going on with the question marks. Thanks for participating. I especially like the last half, from Yesterday on.

    Traveling Chica: Freaky? I'll take that as a compliment :) I wrote it very quickly. Just thoughts running thru my mind.

    Pia: Not looking for sympathy. I'm not sure if I was going for humor or not. Maybe once I got in the middle of it, I was. The note would have to be funny, I suppose.

    You don't have time to leave a note? Maybe I should pre-type one. Then all I have to do is open up drafts and click send?

    Heather B: I'm only a hypochondriac occasionally. It comes and goes. Killer pun, by the way, Pal.

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  10. I love yours, sir. I love the way you make things feel real... I wanted to reach out and help you... I wanted to scream at you, telling you to go to the hospital... to not risk it.

    I participated.

    <3

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  11. Hi! I liked reading through your blog you have a nice blog,
    Thanks for sharing
    Wish you well

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  12. Blondie: Thanks, babe. And thanks for your participation each week :)

    Zingtrial: Thank you for stopping by. You have quite the popular blog :)

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