Saturday, July 07, 2012

Blackberry cleanse

Day four...

I feel almost completely disconnected from society now.  Even more so than normal, I mean.  Friends I once had daily contact with, I haven't heard from in weeks.... or, days.  Last night, I managed to scrounge up some mushrooms for dinner.  (And fish and rice.)  Were they poisonous?  Who knows.  (OK, probably not, as I got them at the grocery store.)

Such is life with no cell phone.

My Blackberry bit the dust on Wednesday.  Died on the 4th of July, someone should make a movie.  Since then I have withdrawn further and further into an isolated, text-less, cell-phone-less existence.

When something you have relied on so heavily is taken away, you can't help but start to ponder things.  Things like, I never realized how texting has almost entirely replaced instant messaging in my life.  I used to have like 186 friends on AIM.  Now, there are five people signed into my Gchat.  And four of those are orange.

I still have a landline, but no one calls.  Or if they do, I don't know it, because they would be calling my Blackberry, which isn't working. And I can't call anyone, because years of reliance on cell phone directories have erased my memory of virtually all phone numbers except immediate family members.  And/or it's long distance.

I suppose I could email someone and ask them to call me.  But I'm not that desperate.  Yet.  Also, sometimes people act like they never got your email, even though it's clearly in your "sent mail" folder and there was never an issue with them getting any of your emails before when they complained because you're still Rickrolling them once a week, but as soon as you send one asking if they want to hang out, all of a sudden they're having Gmail issues!  I mean... I've heard.... that happens.... to other people.

Spending all this time alone, thinking about all the calls and texts I'm missing... it can, uh, make a man crazy.  How bad has it gotten?  Today I almost struck up a conversation with a telemarketer.  Almost.

What's next?  Speaking to someone face-to-face?  I shudder at the thought.

I'm sure some of you might be asking, "Bone, why in the world do you still have a landline?

What can I say?  I have trouble letting go.  Of course, I also have trouble committing, which is kind of a rare combination.  It's not easy being me, OK?

Still others of you may be wondering, "Bone, why don't you just get a new phone?"

Well, that would be the easy thing to do, wouldn't it?  It's just that I dread going to the phone store.  It's like we Blackberry customers have become anathema now.  When I bought mine, the guy was doing everything he could to talk me into another phone, any other phone.  And that was 18 months ago.  I can only imagine he and his good-time iPhone buddies laughing it up after I leave this time.

Also, it's been a welcome break for my Texter's Thumb.  *flexing thumbs*  I can really tell a difference already.

Besides, this has now mutated into some sort of masochistic exercise in self-deprivation.  You see, there comes a time in a man's life when he needs to strike out on his own, remove himself from society for a few days, and see if he can survive without all the modern-day amenities. 

So for the past four days, it's just been me and the bare necessities: my laptop and my TV. 

How long can a person live like this?

As my number of Gchat friends online has now dropped to three, I'm guessing not much longer.

"Open your eyes, you might see / If our lives were that simple, we'd live in the past / If the phone doesn't ring, it's me..."


  1. You are gonna be reborn. And you are gonna miss this short phase of "memoryless" days. Mark my words!

    See the positive. You are blogging about it..!!!

  2. Ugh, phone shops *shudders*. But you can buy these things online now... you may never need to speak to anyone face-to-face ever again!

  3. You see? I KNEW you'd have a Fourth of July story. :D

    lol, I hope you don't hold off too much longer, Bone...are you growing a beard yet and talking in grunts? By the way, I learned the other day that apparently it costs much less to order a new phone online than it does to buy it in the store....I hadn't realized that. Just some info for you in case you do decide to step your little toe back into civilization. Have a good Sunday! (Pssst, we still have a landline, too...)


  5. You're funny, but on the other hand, now that your blackberry has died, you can upgrade to a smart phone that will make you feel really stupid (or at least it makes me feel that way--I miss my blackberry, at least it was logical to operate)

  6. Gautami - You're probably right. I must admit, there are times when it's nice to not be totally connected.

    J Adamthwaite - Hmm, buy my new phone online. Then no one at the store is laughing at me. Sounds like a win-win!

    Sherri B - I've started grunting some. It's just so much easier than talking :) It's funny you mentioned that, as I've wondered before how long I could carry on a conversation without actually using any real words. Just nods and grunts and a few "mmhmms."

    Renee - Well, that settles it then. We were definitely better off before cell phones! :)

    I did remember Elaine having one in the final episode. One of my friends and I still use the phrase "phone face-off" all the time.

    Sage - I love(d) my Blackberry Torch. It's just, inevitably, they all start having the typical Blackberry issues. Guess I may have to finally join the rest of the world and look into getting an iPhone.

  7. Still no phone?!? You DO know they sell these at stores? So you could GO to a store slabs buy one....

    Also. I know that gchat comment was slightly directed toward me. I apologize that my job stops in the summers...

  8. oh, i'm hoping my comment goes through this time. i had some trouble commenting before. i think i've cleared them all up now, we'll see.

    we still have a landline too. mostly because the cell phone reception isn't clear in the country. enjoy your time away from texting and when you decide to come back you can go shopping for another phone to your liking. hope all has been well your way. have a great day~

  9. And I had no way of getting in touch with you when my Internet went down. Didn't even think about your landline :)

    It's nice to be disconnected--when you want to be disconnected and have everything in working order.

    Nothing is working properly here. Combination of hot hot temperatures and salty sea air.

    For the first time my walking everywhere is failing me

  10. I've waited all vacation for a Bone post to read :)

    I'm sorry about your crackberry. I loved mine. Everyone I talked to said I'd like the smart phones better - I do not.

    But I do have two words of comfort to offer you as you make your transition: Angry Birds.

  11. Cami - Nah, not really. I know you'll be back once football season rolls around.

    Naquillity - Yeah, most months I think I'm wasting my money on the landline. But when something like this happens, it's nice to still have one. Good to see you around!

    Pia - It's nice to be disconnected--when you want to be disconnected

    Yes, I think that's the key, being disconnected by choice.

    Under normal circumstances, I never answer my landline. Just assume it's telemarketers. But now it has become my only link to the outside world. Well, besides the internet. And my car.

    TC - Oh, don't think I haven't already thought of that -- Angry Birds, and perhaps more importantly, Words With Friends!!!

  12. IPhones are nice - you should try it out. :-)

    Blackberries servers were down for over 3 days last week - its a dying company (at least in that area), you might as well try something different.

  13. For a minute, I thought you had gone on some weird fruit diet.

    At least you have a landline. I only have the cell, so if I don't find a way to pay the bill, I'm out of touch for sure.

  14. I use messenger. Texts cost too much. Get a new phone!

  15. Go to a smart phone and start downloading apps. I was skeptical but I have long ago proved that they were truly right when they say, "There's an app for that."

  16. No Word Mole, though.

    I saw a billboard for the Torch yesterday, so maybe you can still get another?

  17. Just let me know if it gets to the point where you pick up a book and open the thing. I'll drive down, pronto, and stage an intervention.

  18. I don't know you, but sure hope you survive your "no cell phone" time.

  19. I think the disconnect makes for good writing my dear Bone.

  20. I'm not sure I know what rickrolling is. Should it be capitalized?!?

  21. Bone, I'm a happy BB Torch user who bought my Torch because it was the best phone at the time (no, seriously, it was) with a physical keyboard (see? Qualifying statement). My wife wonders how I can use it because those keys are pretty small but I can type faster and more accurately with those tiny keys than when I use the touchscreen keypad.

    That said, as happy as I am with my BB Torch, in October I should be eligible for a discounted upgrade and at that time I'll be saying goodbye to my Torch and getting the HTC One X, a touchscreen-only phone. I made my decision aided by a very helpful website that lets you compare up to three phones side-by-side. Click to compare Samsung G3 & HTC One X

    I realize Samsung fans will sneer at my choice in much the same manner everyone already sneers at us BB users, but I don't care. Aside from the G3's removable battery, the SD card slot, and greater storage size, the two phones are practically identical, so for me it came down to which phone I physically liked more and that's the One X. Maybe when my contract is finally up and it's crunch time then I might, maybe choose the G3, but given that the G3 is currently more than twice the price of the One X, even with the 2-year contract rebate, I find that doubtful.

  22. Cindy - I have done as you said :) Trying an iPhone. It may warrant a separate post later, I'm not sure.

    Xinh - Well, that was the idea, for the title to be somewhat descriptive and misleading at the same time :)

    MarkD - Got a new phone. And apparently I had two choices -- pay per text, or buy the $20 text package to get unlimited texts. So I'll be texting like a teenage girl. Not that that's much different from before.

    Ed - Done. I've downloaded seven apps so far. I think that's pretty conservative for the first week!

    TC - Nope. No more Word Mole, apparently. But I've found something almost as good: Words With Friends! I mean, let's face it, I could use more socialization anyway. Even if it's only virtual.

    Jocelyn - Thanks. I was two steps away from reading a book and watching UHF when I finally broke down and re-entered the world, aka bought a new phone.

    Renee - Thank you. Six days, but I made it. There is another Renee who comments here. So at first, I thought you were joking. I was like, "Renee! Yes, you DO know me!" :)

    Cooper - That's half the reason I did it. The other half was 85% stubbornness (aka thinking I could fix my old phone).

    Carnealian - Yes, I believe capitalization is correct for Rickrolling. Tell you what, I'll Rickroll you sometime, but you won't know when or where ;-)

    Cap'n John - I loved that about my Torch (the physical keyboard). And when it worked, it was great. But the touchscreen went out on it a couple months ago. And then the phone stopped coming on at all. My previous Blackberry (a Curve) also had an issue. Luckily, that one was still under warranty so I was able to get a replacement.

    I wound up going with an iPhone. I figured the only Apple product I have (iPod) has never given me any problems, so I might as well try it. I had always been reluctant because of the on-screen keyboard, but it's actually not as bad as I thought. And everything is really easy to navigate.