Monday, November 03, 2008

Stormtroopers, shakers, and we're #1?

Friday was Halloween. I should have warned you about this ahead of time. I know how unsettling it can be to have people dressed in scary costumes wandering down the street and knocking on your door if you're not prepared for it.

My final trick-or-treater count for the night was four. Kywana brought their two offspring by, which gave me a much needed reason to clean my house. The kids were dressed as Batgirl and a lion. They also had a stray stormtrooper in tow, who apparently had escaped the Death Star but forgot his helmet. I never realized how vital the helmet is to the stormtrooper ensemble. Otherwise, it just sort of looks like a bad Cameo getup. Word up?

After they left, I took the Millenium Falcon over to my sister's to visit Nephew Bone. My sister didn't want to get him out for some reason, so we had to bring his gifts to him. Talk about having it made! Nephew Bone was dressed up as a turtle, as you may or may not be able to see from this picture. Just trust me, he's a turtle.

There seems to be a general decline in the number of trick-or-treaters each year. I find that very disheartening. Kids who do trick-or-treat seem to be giving it up earlier and earlier, bowing out by age nine or ten. I'm thinking of speaking at a couple of Kindergarten assemblies to try and encourage kids to get out there and collect candy from these fools who are so stupidly giving it away.

Saturday, I attended the Bama/Arkansas State game. It was the first time Bama had played Arkansas State since 1982. I was also at that game, which we won 34-7. I remember ASU blocked a punt late for a touchdown. I also remember Mom pointing out Bear Bryant standing by the goal post before the game. It was Bear's last season. That was only the second Bama game I had ever attended. So Saturday had sort of a coming full circle feeling for me.

This week was also homecoming and several of the regulars who sit around us--Earl, DUI, Ultimatum, Carlin--weren't there. Before the game, my sister turns to me and says, "Does this guy behind us have a mullet?" Trying to be as inconspicuous as possible, I turned and discovered that yes, indeed, he did. It was old school, too. A vintage Camaro crash helmet. I immediately nicknamed him Billy Ray.

Bama won the game 35-0 thanks to a strong performance by the defense and a solid running game. And after Texas lost to Texas Tech Saturday night, Bama became the #1 ranked team in the nation. It's nice to be recognized, but honestly it makes me even more nervous than I am normally. I'd rather have remained #2 and then jump to #1 after the last game. Rankings don't mean much until the end of the season. I'm going to be shaking like a car with an out of balance tire on the interstate watching the LSU game this coming Saturday.

Speaking of shaking, I want to close today with a heartwarming brother/sister story. Red and white shakers are a big thing at Bama games. It seems like at least half of the 92,000 fans have them, yours truly included. Well, a streamer from one of the shakers wound up in my sister's Coke. So she turns to me and asks, "Is it OK to still drink this?"

"Yeah," I replied, waiting a couple of seconds before continuing. "It's OK for you. It wouldn't be OK for me."

"Wave your hands in the air like you don't care. Glide by the people as they start to look and stare. Do your dance. Do your dance. Do your dance quick, mama..."


  1. Being #1 is terrifying. #2 is bad enough.

    The thought of playing LSU makes me want to barf.

    And the bigger thought of playing Florida makes me just about hyperventilate.

    I'm just saying.

    Neph looks presh :)

    **And I like the Seinfeld reference about the people who are so foolishly giving candy away :)

  2. I was house sitting this weekend and got to hand out candy from a different house. This one girl came wearing a short skirt, heels, and a shirt that left hardly anything to the imagination. I asked her what she was.

    A hoe.

    Okay, just wanted to make sure I judged you appropriately... yikes. What happened to devils and angels?!

  3. Congratulations to 'bama! ACC basketball isn't far off.

  4. My sister didn't want to get him out for some reason, so we had to bring his gifts to him. Talk about having it made!

    Well, at least you were welcome to go visit Nephew Bone for Halloween. Not all of us were afforded that option :)

    And, though I'm sure you've discovered this already in the years since she's been married it gets way worse when the offspring start arriving, you'll soon find that you'll probably always have to go to her. Suddenly people who usually were willing to venture out of their house suddenly think everyone should come to them if they wish to be blessed by the youngin's presence. And of course we always do.

    /end TC's own negative (and selfish) rant regarding her own niece/nephew situation

    I loved the story about the shaker (though the rest of the world calls them "poms" I believe) :) It's good to know that your sister didn't get the germophobe gene ;-)

  5. I do want to hear your speech about the free candy, when you get around to giving it - I'm sure it would be worth the drive.

  6. ok, about Arkansas State and Alabama.. of course since I live in Alabama, I otta be an Alabama fan. And if I'm not, surely I otta be an Auburn fan. Fact is, I'm really not either.. my dad actually did graduate from Arkansas State (when they were still Indians). I graduated from Oregon State - - so actually I'm for Oregon State. Who knew?!

  7. Cami - Ah, you got the Seinfeld reference! You have no idea how happy that makes me :)

    Charlotta - Wow. I'm afraid to ask how old she was. Yeah, whatever happened to angels and ghosts and butterflies?

    Sage - Thanks. Basketball season doesn't start here until January, but I did see where your Heels are the preseason #1.

    TC - Didn't mean to get you all riled up there :)

    Shaker just sounds so much manlier than pom pom. Or slightly manlier anyway.

    Marcia - I'll see if I can reserve you a good seat :)

    Shelby - Ah, the Beavers. Well that makes sense. I remember now you writing fondly about Oregon. The state, not the school.

  8. That was a truly heartwarming brother and sister story

    I liked the Bear one, and Nephew Bone

  9. He is a turtle? He looks like a dino or lizard or something like that.

    yeah, kind of mad about the whole Texas losing to Tech thing. But go red tide! (or whatever it is you people say.)

  10. You want to come over and watch election results? lol

  11. whoops, I wasn't done writing yet.

    NB is a turtle... that is cool. btw, send us the pic you took of the GS. If it might be a non-fussy pic, it might be the only non-fussy one we have.

    They never had costumes like this when I was a kid. They are so life like. It use to be some crap plastic get up with filmsy accents. Now it's all plush and furry looking.

  12. He's so cute! What a cute nephew you have.

  13. beggar ween was a complete bust at my house - not even one knock at the door, so now i am planning to build a gingerbread house with all that extra candy- got any suggestions where Nerds can be used on a gingerbread house?

  14. Pia - Thank you. I'm not sure heartwarming was exactly the right word there, but I was too lazy to visit

    HotPink - I agree. It's supposed to be a turtle though. Eh, they're all reptiles. That's close enough I guess.

    Java - Hey, there was nothing quite like those plastic masks with the thin rubber band strap and that microscopic nose hole.

    OK Chick - Thank you. I sure think so!

    Daily Panic - I'm thinking maybe as pebbles in a gravel walkway. By the way, I loved Nerds!

  15. Nephew Bone makes a great Turtle! LOVES IT!!

  16. Perhaps you could get more trick-or-treaters if you made a sign and put it outside your place... "Hey Kids! Free Candy!"

    on second though that might not be a good idea. oh well.