(Please note that I'm not a professional photographer. I consider myself more of a scene capturer.)
Car charger is a bit of a misnomer. It doesn't actually charge your car. Though it would be really cool if it did. It would also be kinda cool if it played mp3's, or if it at least had a laser pointer on it. But that's neither here nor there.
What I would like to point out today is the relative shortness of my car charger. (Photo is approximately 1/2 actual size.) This has proved quite impractical as far as talking on the phone while it is charging. I either have to end a call to charge my phone for awhile, or I have to put my ear really close to the cigarette lighter, which is located somewhere between the radio and my knee.
Last night, I went to a minor league baseball game with Kywana and some children. (What? I can't be flipping jet skis every single weekend.) We did the usual ballgame stuff. The kids got a hug from some guy dressed in a polecat outfit (who I hope was the mascot). We sang "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" during the seventh inning stretch. And we discussed the correct lyrics to a Britney Spears song. (Which I thought said, "Oops, I did it again. I played with my heart." It really takes on a much deeper meaning that way if you think about it.)
When we got in the car after the game, I asked the female portion of Kywana to plug my phone in to charge. Upon arriving back at Kywana's house, I retrieved my car charger, and it looked like this:
It appeared that the wire had been violently ripped out of the unit! (Notice the flagellum-like extension protruding from the right side. And also the two golf tees near the top of the photo. They're all over the place around here.) What had happened? I wondered if my car charger would ever work again.
Then a few seconds later... Oh! It's like a tape measure or something. The cord is retractable. Oh! I see now. I've only had this phone for nine months. I would have figured that out eventually.
Hey, cut me some slack. I was in a horrific, low speed jet ski accident last weekend.
"I feel stupid, but I know it won't last for long. I've been guessin', and I could've been guessin' wrong..."
I wanted to leave a charming, witty comment about the humor of your post. But, unfortunately, I can't stop shaking my head slowly side-to-side and wondering aloud, Did he really not know it was retractable or is he feigning moderate levels of stupidity for the amusement of others?
ReplyDeleteI'm so scared that it's the former and not the latter.
If it makes you feel better, I had a hair dryer that FOR YEARS had about a foot-long cord. It bugged me and I kept bumping my head against the wall everytime I would dry my hair, but was too cheap to replace the dryer.
ReplyDeleteYep. You guessed it. Retractable cord.
I only knew about it when I dropped the dryer - accidentally - and bungee jumped instead of hanging itself.
PS. LOVE the photography.
ReplyDeleteThanks for the Monday morning laugh, Bone, and for me to know I'm in good company when I have similar discoveries.
ReplyDeleteSomehow I am not surprised. Living most of my life with three brothers, nothing does any more.
ReplyDelete:D
Yep, this is the best way to get a Monday started. *giggle*
ReplyDeleteBone, you are the best part of wakin' up this foggy Monday morning. I always love starting my week off with a laugh! Of course, I'm laughing with you, not at you ;). The mental picture of you with your head down at the cigarette lighter made me laugh out loud!!
ReplyDeleteAvery - Speaking of latter (well sort of), I did the "We need a batter, not a broken ladder" cheer at the game Saturday night and the kids had never heard it! Can someone please tell me what we are teaching our children?
ReplyDeleteEileen Dover - That DOES make me feel better! I only wish there were a YouTube video of that ;-)
PS: The photography comment meant a lot.
Sage - You're welcome. Unfortunately, this sort of thing rarely happens to me... depending on your definition of rarely.
Gautami - So your brothers are borderline technological geniuses, too? Cool!
Kontan - That seems to be the consensus. Glad you enjoyed it.
Jennifer - Yes, of course. You're laughing with me, not at me. That's what the teachers at school used to say, too. I never believed them, either :)
It's a good thing your charger wasn't broken. Those things are expensive! Actually I used to sell cell phones, and the mark up on them is TERRIBLE! Actual cost is around 5 bucks but they are never less than 30 when you buy them! Sorry you thought it was broken for a minute, but I have to admit it was really funny when you realized it was retractable! :)
ReplyDeleteYou discussed the correct lyrics to a Brittany Spears song AND you went 9 months without realizing the charger was retractable? I'm not too sure about you...
ReplyDeleteGeniuses can't be bothered with minute details such as retractable cords. I know I have more important things to think about.
ReplyDeleteOn another note, if you ever find yourself discussing the song Elevation by U2, Bono does not begin the song by screaming 'Hell, Damnation'. I, uh, know someone who thought that for the longest time.
ROTFLOL! I can't not say anything that would be mean. LOL!
ReplyDeleteI'm happy that you've finally (after all this time) figured out your charger.
they just don't make stuff like they used to- like when an ice cream scoop was just a scoop, now it is a gadget. The new scoop is like a plunger that will reach in your ice cream grab it and extract ice cream in a cylinder shape just round enough to fit in a cone.
ReplyDeleteImproved? I haven't decided.
Bone I am laughing at you, not with you. Kidding
ReplyDeleteThis is another hysterical post by Bone. It was all great but I loved this
We sang "Take Me Out To The Ballgame" during the seventh inning stretch. And we discussed the correct lyrics to a Britney Spears song. (Which I thought said, "Oops, I did it again. I played with my heart." It really takes on a much deeper meaning that way if you think about it.)
Singing "Take me out..." and then segueing into the correct B Spears lyrics. Put Spears without an initial and then realized the ultra-responsible Jamie might have recorded a song once--well magazines make her into the second coming since she married her boyfriend, had her baby and hasn't done anything to harm Maddie yet. Sorry for the editorial :)
Oh the car charger story was very funny. I just loved that paragraph
The mind of Bone....
Ha! That's funny. I've had stuff happen like that. I don't think that is the case for the coffee grinder we have. It's a nice deluxe model that has nice settings and such on it. However, the cord is like 6 inches. And that's a true 6 inches not a guy 6 inches. So, where the heck am I supposed to plug it?? I have a plug just above my counter but then I have to stand there an hold the grinder whilst it's grinding. I don't think the cords retractable.
ReplyDeleteLove your blog! Very funny!
ReplyDeleteA friend once told me the only reason I needed a man in my life was to open pickle jars. (Which isn't true, but it works for the point I'm making.) Perhaps this is why you need a woman in your life: to figure out your techy gadgets.
ReplyDeleteWomen need men to open pickle jars... men need women to work their tech gadgets. Yeah, it seems like it could work.
P.S. I hope your Dad had his best birthday yet, and that ya'll also had a wonderful day of being thankful to spend time with him.
that just made my day.
ReplyDeleteAs I was reading, I was thinking, "One would think the phone charger making company would have made it retractable or something"
Evidently, I'm brilliant.... which is why I continue to read this ;)
now you know,, if i had done that people would have been quick to say it was because i was a woman...i however know it is because i am over 40... so then... what was your excuse again??? LOL too funny bone!!
ReplyDeleteMrs. R - Aha! So you used to sell them. That's how you knew it was retractable.
ReplyDeleteCoconut - No one is too sure about me. I kinda like it that way :)
Charlotta - Exactly! All the more reason I need a personal assistant.
Renee - Go ahead. Laugh it up at my expense. After all, isn't that what this blog is all about :)
Daily Panic - Really! I mean, was a dangling cord that big a problem that they had to go and invent a retractable one? Were people tripping over the cord... in the car? I think not.
Pia - At least you're honest :) Meanwhile, it sounds like SOMEONE has been keeping up with the Spears. (Or is it Spearses?) I'll be expecting more Spears Family updates on your blog in the near future.
Carnealian - Maybe you're not pulling on it hard enough :)
Purpleronnie - Glad you enjoyed it. Thanks for stopping by.
Someone - Perhaps. I did date a girl once who said she needed a guy to open things and to kill spiders.
Cami - That's why I'm here :) Well you were way ahead of me. I don't know. I mostly just use my phone to check and see how my fantasy baseball players are doing .
Paisley - Hmm. I think I shall defer back to Charlotta-love's earlier comment :)
Hey Bone! Just checkin' in to say hello, see what you're up to, and this made me seriously giggle! You must have worked REALLY hard at not pulling that out these past 9 months, because they come out quite easily!
ReplyDeletehehehehe, I'm still giggling at you :-D
Hope you're doing well!