Scary close

Wow, I'm not sure if it's a good thing or not, but most of this seems pretty accurate.

The Keys to Your Heart

You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.

In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.

You'd like to your lover to think you are loyal and faithful... that you'll never change.

You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.

Your ideal relationship is comforting. You crave a relationship where you always feel warmth and love.

Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.

You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.

In this moment, you think of love as commitment. Love only works when both people are totally devoted.

What Are The Keys To Your Heart?

"It's not good for a man to be alone, but a woman needs someone that she can count on. And what I'd give to go back, but the current's just too strong. Love is like the Mississippi. When she's gone, she's gone..."

5-year reunion

That's what it felt like at Applebee's yesterday. Rainbow Brite was up there, then Emily came in, all while we sat with Donna. Tag and Tracy also came in, so it was kinda like an LMV mini-reunion as well. I actually hadn't eaten there in about a month. They have some new menu items, so I tried the paremsan shrimp steak entree. It came out raw, but after they cooked it some more, it was good, and since it took awhile, it was also half price. Some things never change...

"Freeze Frame" came on the Muzak service while we were in there, so I was obviously getting excited. This ensued:
"Oh man, Freeze Frame!"
"Uh huh, but do you know who sings it?"
"J. Geils Band."
"That's right."
"I have the cassette."
"Well, I have the album."
"Oh wow. I think you just trumped me."

We were also talking about Mother's Day gifts. I suggested a lovely Betta fish, with tank and colorful rocks. Apparently, no one else thought that was a good idea. A Betta can provide life and color to an entire room, plus companionship for weeks and months to come.

I went running yesterday. My knee started hurting pretty bad, so I only ran two miles, then walked another. Here's an interesting situation: Two hotties were approaching me on the track. As they passed, they both said, "Hey." For some reason, I was really nervous as they approached, and the best I could muster was an almost below my breath "hey", which probably came out sounding more like a trademark Napoleon Dynamite heavy sigh. Shortly afterward, two slightly obese ladies passed me, and I had no problem saying hey to them. What's up with that?

The Booty called last night. Sounds like things are going well in Virginia. We really need to fly up there to see her this summer. Notice I said fly, and not drive. There's nothing quite like a 12-hour drive in the back of an overheating 1987 Pontiac Sunbird, with knees to chest, feeling like I'm in a Gemini space capsule.

On another random note, my sister and her husband bought a boat this week. So, perhaps I'll be invited to go out on the lake with them at some point. One would hope, at least.

Well, another weekend is upon us! I'm sure it will be filled with excitement... or hold very little excitement. Whichever. I just want to wish all the mothers out there a very Happy Mothers Day Sunday. Be sure to let your Mom know how much you love and appreciate her. I'll leave you today with the immortal words of the great Vanilla Ice... word to ya mothers.

"Now I'm looking at a flashback Sunday, zoom lens feeling just won't disappear. Close up, dark room, sweet talk in my ear..."

Nocturnal Phantasm #505A

Nothing like a little nocturnal phun to kick off your Friday. Last night I dreamed...

I was planning a trip to New York with one of my friends, so I had purchased two plane tickets. Well, I needed a ride to the airport, so I was trying to get Dad to take me, but for some reason, he was in a very ornery mood. He said he had run out of medication, so that's why he was acting that way. Anyway, before I even left for the airport, I called my friend, and he said that he wasn't going. So basically I have wasted money on these two tickets. Anyway, he said even though he said he would go, he never knew that the plans were finalized for sure, even though I told him I would buy the tickets. So he had made other plans. At this point, I decided to call and see if I could get at least a partial refund. They told me they could give me all but sixty dollars back, but I'd have to turn the tickets in before the flight left. It was at this point that I decided to call a female friend of mine to see if she wanted to go. She was up for it, but by this time, we only had 45 minutes to pack and get to the airport, and neither of us were packed. So I went on to the airport to try and get some of my money back. Shortly after I arrived, everyone began to sit down on the floor against the wall in a tornado drill position. Best I could understand, there were four planes landing within seconds of each other, and it was feared that one of them might crash into the airport. Anyway, all of the planes landed safely, except one small plane which rolled up onto its nose as it came to a stop. Then out of nowhere, various-sized projectiles suddenly streaked across the sky and landed in the distance. Everyone was like, "What was that?" Then a voice could be heard saying that it was a third-world country firing back all the bombs and missiles our government had dropped on them over the years. Weird. Why are dreams like that?

"And when you find, you're spending your time wanting for words, but never speak. You tell yourself that the things you need come slow, but inside you just don't know..."

Bloggiversary

Two years ago today, I began blogging, not knowing where it would lead and surely never imagining I would still be at it two years later. Oh well. It all started on my 2MB of alloted AOL webspace. Wow, that's primitive. That's not even old school. That's more like preschool. It's sort of like reading a third grade book report by a young Bill Shakespeare... or nothing at all like that. Hey, that reminds me of possibly the greatest SNL skit of all-time:

"Now, young man, what do you want to do with your life?"
"Actually, Matt, I kinda wanna be a writer."
"Well la-de-freakin-da! We've got ourselves a writer here! Hey, Dad, I can't see real good! Is that Bill Shakespeare over there?"
"Well, actually, Matt, Ellen and I have encouraged Brian in his writing."
"Dad, I wish you could just shut your big yapper!"

Anywho, I guess we're having a bloggiversary party all day today. Woo. Somebody bring the Chumbawamba CD.

Today is also 05/05/05... freaky. And the other night when I laid down, my cell phone read 00:00. I thought, "I must be at the nexus of the space-time continuum."

"I had somebody else once, and she just gave me one try. And second chances these days are so hard to come by..."

O Happy Day!

Scott is gone! Scott is gone! Rejoice, my children! Rejoice!

And if there's any merit to this ABC special tonight, Paula may not be too far behind him. Wow! Scandalous.

"I hope that I won't be that wrong anymore. Maybe I've learned this time. I hope that I'll find what I'm reachin' for, the way that it is in my mind..."

The Fab Five?

Well, it was bound to happen. As you get older, hopefully you get wiser, more mature, and soon you begin to see it. You start to hear yourself saying things he would say, thinking things he would think. You begin to see characteristics of him in yourself. Yes, it has happened. I'm starting to see Simon in me. He is officially now the only sane judge left. I guess before long I'll be wearing pastel colors and cutting my hair like his. Let's get on to the rankings of last night's performances on American Idol. Each of the five contestants sang (parts of) two songs last night. Here's the way I saw it:

1. Bo - For the second week in a row, it wasn't even close. Bo brought it home on both songs. Great song choices. Both were very familiar. He is back in that zone where he no longer looks like he's competing, he is simply performing. I have really only seen him and Constantine do that. If the drug charges don't affect his support, he is clearly the front-runner in my mind.

2. Carrie - There is a huge gap between first and second, much like last week. Didn't care for Carrie's first choice. Why does she pick songs that are so low, where she growls all the way through? Her second song was much better. She still has the personality of a log, and she always looks frightened. I think a lot of people made up their mind early on that she was their favorite and they're going to vote for her no matter what week after week. That being said, she was better than the other three last night.

3. Vonzell - OK, I somehow missed her entire second song. I thought the first song was her worst performance in awhile. The first half was very flat. It wasn't terrible, just not up to par with her last few weeks. She might be in danger tonight. She and Anthony have been in the bottom three more than once, and with Scott's inexplicable continued support, one of those two will probably get cut tonight.

4. Scott - I thought he did pretty well on his first song for a change. The second was typical Scott. The problem is, even when he sings as well as he possibly can, he still doesn't have the talent of the others. It was hilarious when Paula asked him if he knew what "moxie" was. He had no clue. That was great. Scott is kinda like the unpopular fat kid in school that someone nominates for class president or something, and he runs and does his best, not knowing the whole time that everyone is making fun of him and laughing at him. It's cruel, but hey, that's life. Of course, if he wins, I guess he gets the last laugh.

5. Anthony - I thought his two performances were night and day. His first song was maybe the worst performance I've heard on AI since William Hung. I thought he sang very well on his second song, even though I had never heard it. However, he has been in the bottom three so many times, I'm afraid this might be his last week. He has a great story, and I think a lot of people have voted for him based on that. But honestly, based on performances, he and Scott should have been gone weeks ago.

I can't help but think how much better last night's show would have been if Constantine and Jessica had been on there instead of Anthony and Scott. You know what I think? I think the judges may have realized their comments were partly responsible for some of the better contestants being gone, so they pretty much all heaped praise last night on Bo and Carrie. I hope you voted last night. Remember, as Kerry so astutely stated, a vote for anyone is a vote against Scott.

"This is it now. Everybody get down. This is all I can take. This is how a heart breaks. You take a hit now. You feel it break down. Make you stay wide awake. This is how a heart breaks..."

Important. Impending. Impossible?

Important Dates
May 14: Impending beach trip. Awaiting confirmation from Marty McFly. So far, it's myself (aka Steve-O), Lee (aka Pontius), and Kyle (aka Uncle Rico). That will be a fearsome foursome right there. Look out, ladies! Woohoo!

May 17: Seinfeld Season 4 DVDs are released. Two weeks! Ggggghhhhhhh!

May 21: My ex-girlfriend of just over two years gets married. If the Seinfeld DVDs were not coming out four days before, this would probably be my final day on the face of the Earth. Now, it looks as if that will be postponed until my girlfriend of 4+ years gets married. Oh, and this is the date of our local 10K run. So I may actually kill myself anyway, accidentally. What a week!

American Idol Night
Well, it's AI night, and that means I'm cooking something new. On the menu tonight, some sort of chicken and cheese casserole thing. We'll see how it turns out. Wonder what will happen on American Scandal tonight? Will Paula be on uppers or downers? And if she is, did she get them from Bo? Will Scott's ever-puzzling support be affected by the Spike TV special, How To Beat A Domestic Violence Charge, airing in the same time slot? Will Carrie drop out of the competition, announcing that she has signed a deal to become the official Barbie spokesmodel for Mattel? Or will she be disqualified for breaking a little-known AI rule that states one contestant can sing no more than twelve Martina McBride songs in the same season. Will documents surface showing Anthony is a Communist sympathizer and that he actually may know who killed Kennedy? Will Simon finally profess his man-love for Randy? Tune in tonight to find out.

101 Ways To Tell If You're A Loser
#78. If your fiancee skips town less than a week before your wedding, travels across the country, leading to a nationwide search for her, leaving you as a prime suspect for her murder, only to turn herself in once she runs out of money, and you still want to marry her, you might be a loser. Talk about whipped. Wow! That's the kind of stability we're all looking for in a spouse and possible mother of our children.

My weekend
I went running Thursday afternoon, Friday afternoon, and Sunday evening. So I'm sort of getting back on a schedule there. I worked till Noon on Saturday. Shot some pool Saturday night. I was looking like Earl Strickland out there. Well, Earl Strickland at about age 3, to clarify. Went to eat at TGIFriday's. Let me offer you a little tip. If you're thinking about ordering one of their "sizzling" entrees, don't get your hopes too high for the "sizzling" part. You might be disappointed. Oh, they had a security guard there just standing at the door the whole time. It reminded me of the Seinfeld where George sees a security guard standing, so he brings him a rocking chair. At the end of the show, the guard has fallen asleep in the chair and the store is being robbed. Played a little tennis Sunday evening after church. Ate at Ruby Tuesday's. Jean-Paul did a very nice job as our waiter. I hope he doesn't oversleep for his next marathon.

The Impossible?
Had a nice conversation with Dad Sunday:
"Son, are you dating anybody?"
"Nope."
"You need to get out and meet some girls somewhere."
(Great fatherly advice there. Later...)
"Whatever happened to that girl... uhhh..."
"What girl?"
"You know the one that liked you."
"Jessica?"
"Yeah, Jessica. Whatever happened to her?"
"Well, apparently she didn't like me as much as you thought."

I love those kinds of talks...

"Don't know why he says all those things, always shootin' down all your dreams. He oughta know better than that. He oughta be watchin' his back, cos you know, you know, girl I love the shine in your eyes..."

Slow down

One of the sad things about life to me is seeing my parents get older. There is not really one specific event or moment to which I could point. It is more of a gradual thing, I think. One day I just woke up and saw it, and wondered where in the world all the time had gone. My sister and Mom went to Nashville shopping together this past week. I was talking to my sister on the phone that night and she said something which I had thought to myself several times before, "Mom is getting old." I believe my response was something to the effect of, "Yeah, I know."

I know that my parents are not old old. They both turn 55 this year. Then I think about people who have already lost one or both parents, or people who never even knew one or both parents, and I think, "Who am I to be sad?" But I guess we all go thru different situations at different times. I just see differences in my parents now and from ten and fifteen years ago. And I know that is completely natural and to be expected, but it still makes me a little bit sad. When I think about it, it makes me miss family vacations of long ago, Mom and Dad taking me to little league baseball games, playing football or basketball in the backyard. I miss being outside and hearing Mom or Dad call me in for supper with the whole family sitting around the table. I guess that anything you look back on fondly, and then realize it will never be again, makes you a little bit sad.

I suppose that there is a time in life when you are young that you think that things will last forever. Or maybe it is just that you do not yet have a complete concept of time. All you are concerned about is today, and everything that is here today you just take for granted will be here tomorrow, and the day after tomorrow, and the day after that, and so on. And when you are young, you do not really have a care in the world to amount to anything. Your parents can seemingly do anything, take care of any problem. They almost seem invincible. Then one day you realize that they are only human, and as they get older, that becomes even clearer. Perhaps it is not just my parents getting older that makes me sad. Perhaps it is more than that. A longing for a past that always seems better now than it seemed way back then.

So what do you do? What do I do? I guess the obvious answer is to spend more time with the ones we love and cherish each moment we have together. We never know when someone we care about will be taken away. I know that is so cliched, but I think it is very good advice.

I remember so many weekend nights my parents would go out to eat or whatever. Many times on the way home, I would sit in the back seat and look out the back window up at the moon and the stars and the clouds. And I would always be a little sad coming home. I would beg for us to go by and see one of my aunts or uncles, just anything so that we could stay out a little longer. For some reason, I never wanted the evening to end.

And now all these years later, I guess I still don't.

"What I'd give to have back all those long afternoons, I wasted being bored. And just half of the freedom and innocence lost, searching hard for something more. There's a price to pay as time moves along. Momma's gettin' old and Dad's already gone..."