Whenever I meet someone on the street, there is a wide array of greetings that I can use. They range from a nod, a simple "hey", or the eyebrow raise, to the stop-and-hug or stop-and-talk. If I pass someone I do not know very well, or perhaps do not know at all, I might give a simple smile or a quick passing "hey." If it is someone I know, and especially if I have not seen them in awhile, they might expect me to stop and talk to them for a bit.
Now, that is all well and good. But from the time you first spot someone, if you are approaching them, you only have a very short time to decide on the proper greeting, possibly as few as two or three seconds. This is where our somewhat instinctive Proper Greeting System (or PGS... not to be confused with GPS) kicks in, or is supposed to anyway. Sometimes it malfunctions, and this can lead to some quite awkward moments.
A real-life example
Here is a situation that happened to me. I was in Food World, walking up the chips and drinks aisle. When I got to the end, I saw a girl who looked very familiar, pushing a cart with a baby in it, in the dairy section. My PGS apparently did not have enough time to assess the situation. So I stopped. Almost instantly, I knew this was a mistake. I could not think of this girl's name, or even how I knew her. So I made small talk. "How are you?" "Is this yours (referring to the baby)?" Finally, I was out of there. I still to this day do not know for sure who she was, just that I recognized her from somewhere.
Aloofness: A good thing
See? In this case, I should have gone with the passing "hey" or a simple smile. Much better to risk someone thinking that you are being unfriendly, than to put yourself into an awkward and uncomfortable situation. So when in doubt, always err on the side of aloofness. Of course, some people force the stop-and-talk, by themselves stopping. It's very difficult to do a passing "hey" when someone else has already stopped for a stop-and-talk.
Stop=Commitment
The problem with the stop-and-talk is that by stopping, you are making a commitment right there of at least fifteen to thirty seconds. You can't just stop, say "hey" and move on. It seems that a few seconds of small talk is required. It would be nice if you could say, "Oh, you know what? I really did not mean to stop. I should have just given you a quick passing "hey" and kept walking. So, I'm really sorry. I'll see ya later."
A new greeting
One happy medium could be found in the increasingly popular slow-down-with-180-degree-turn. This is where you slow down as your reach the person, possibly greet them with a handshake or arm touch, but continue moving the entire time, all the while turning your body to continue facing them. This is a more friendly greeting than the passing "hey" and also gives you a few extra seconds to determine whether or not you want to stop. When you reach the end of your 180-degree-turn, you can then elect to stop and talk or turn and walk away.
Stay tuned for more 21st Century social perplexities and bachelor quandaries...
"Gonna hold who needs holdin', mend what needs mendin', walk what needs walkin', though it means an extra mile. Pray what needs prayin', gonna say what needs sayin', cos we're only here for a little while..."
Monday, February 28, 2005
Sunday, February 27, 2005
My weekend with Daisy Duke
Today's little known proverb: Two locusts doth not a plague make.
Well, I've been enjoying the Dukes of Hazzard marathon on CMT for much of the weekend. Here's what else has (or hasn't) been going on...
Come on, Reg!
I'm sitting here watching celebrity Jeopardy on GSN. It's Stephen King, some lady, and Regis. King is killing. The lady is doing pretty good. Regis is waaaay behind. He reminds me of those SNL Jeopardy spoofs. LOL
Friday
The extended birthday celebration continued Friday at work. Some lady brought me a card and some chocolate oatmeal and peanut butter and oatmeal cookies. Wow, that's like a Chanukah birthday or something. ("You've got one day, but we have eight crazy nights...") Went and hung out at Matt's Friday night. Nothing too exciting.
Saturday
Had to work Saturday morning. Came home, watched the end of the Bama game. One of my friends from high school had called and was wanting to get together, so she, Jonathan, and one of his friends came over Saturday night and we played spades. Later, Jack, Paige, and Jack Jr. showed up. Seven is the most people I've had in my apartment in a long time, surpassing the six which were here on Christmas. I think it might be the most since the famous suprise birthday party, which is kinda sad. Jack asked how it felt to be 32. I think everyone was amused at my response of, "It feels great. Feels so good, it makes me just want to smash my head thru the TV." That got a big laugh.
One funny did happen. I noticed the baby was wearing a Boston Bruins jacket. I didn't say anything, but I thought to myself, "I didn't know Jack was such a hockey fan. And, where do you even find hockey merchandise around here, much less Boston Bruins merchandise?" So later, he was crying, and I was trying to get him to stop, so I was like, "What's the matter? Are you sad that the NHL cancelled their season?" So then Jack tells the story that Paige bought the jacket and thought the "B" on it stood for boy. It was clearly a black and gold Bruins "B". Oh man, it was hilarious.
We all vowed to get together more in the future. You know how that goes. It was a fun time, though. Everyone left about 10:30 and I realized I hadn't eaten supper, so I fixed some soup and a salad. Had a weird dream about the really short waitress at Logan's last night... Veronica... Bethany... Julie... whatever her name is. OK, I'm gonna get back to doing laundry and get ready to watch the race.
Dialogue
"I rode the ferris wheel with her one time at the Lawrence County Fair."
"Did you ask her to ride or did she ask you?"
"She asked me, of course. You can't just walk up to a girl and ask her to ride with you. What planet are you on?"
"Did you buy clear Kool-Aid? This tastes like water."
"So what about you? Do you have a girlfriend?"
"If he had a girlfriend, he wouldn't be over here playing cards with us on a Saturday night. At least I hope not."
"Ain't no glory in this livin'. Ain't no runnin' from your sins. I hope there's angels where I'm goin'. Ain't no angels where I've been..."
Well, I've been enjoying the Dukes of Hazzard marathon on CMT for much of the weekend. Here's what else has (or hasn't) been going on...
Come on, Reg!
I'm sitting here watching celebrity Jeopardy on GSN. It's Stephen King, some lady, and Regis. King is killing. The lady is doing pretty good. Regis is waaaay behind. He reminds me of those SNL Jeopardy spoofs. LOL
Friday
The extended birthday celebration continued Friday at work. Some lady brought me a card and some chocolate oatmeal and peanut butter and oatmeal cookies. Wow, that's like a Chanukah birthday or something. ("You've got one day, but we have eight crazy nights...") Went and hung out at Matt's Friday night. Nothing too exciting.
Saturday
Had to work Saturday morning. Came home, watched the end of the Bama game. One of my friends from high school had called and was wanting to get together, so she, Jonathan, and one of his friends came over Saturday night and we played spades. Later, Jack, Paige, and Jack Jr. showed up. Seven is the most people I've had in my apartment in a long time, surpassing the six which were here on Christmas. I think it might be the most since the famous suprise birthday party, which is kinda sad. Jack asked how it felt to be 32. I think everyone was amused at my response of, "It feels great. Feels so good, it makes me just want to smash my head thru the TV." That got a big laugh.
One funny did happen. I noticed the baby was wearing a Boston Bruins jacket. I didn't say anything, but I thought to myself, "I didn't know Jack was such a hockey fan. And, where do you even find hockey merchandise around here, much less Boston Bruins merchandise?" So later, he was crying, and I was trying to get him to stop, so I was like, "What's the matter? Are you sad that the NHL cancelled their season?" So then Jack tells the story that Paige bought the jacket and thought the "B" on it stood for boy. It was clearly a black and gold Bruins "B". Oh man, it was hilarious.
We all vowed to get together more in the future. You know how that goes. It was a fun time, though. Everyone left about 10:30 and I realized I hadn't eaten supper, so I fixed some soup and a salad. Had a weird dream about the really short waitress at Logan's last night... Veronica... Bethany... Julie... whatever her name is. OK, I'm gonna get back to doing laundry and get ready to watch the race.
Dialogue
"I rode the ferris wheel with her one time at the Lawrence County Fair."
"Did you ask her to ride or did she ask you?"
"She asked me, of course. You can't just walk up to a girl and ask her to ride with you. What planet are you on?"
"Did you buy clear Kool-Aid? This tastes like water."
"So what about you? Do you have a girlfriend?"
"If he had a girlfriend, he wouldn't be over here playing cards with us on a Saturday night. At least I hope not."
"Ain't no glory in this livin'. Ain't no runnin' from your sins. I hope there's angels where I'm goin'. Ain't no angels where I've been..."
Friday, February 25, 2005
Friday Five
TV Alert: Rachel Ray on Letterman tonight(2/25)!
Not much to blog about today, so I figured, I'd do this. (from The Friday Five)
1.) If you were in a band (you know, a successful one...), and you HAD to remake an old song, what band/song would you choose and why?
I'd remake a Milli Vanilli song, because no one plays them anymore, and maybe they'd play our version, but probably not. What song? Umm, "Blame It On The Rain", cos I can't understand all the words to "Girl You Know It's True."
2.) If you were a Make-a-Wish child, what would you wish for (and why)?
Well, when I was a kid, I wanted to meet Michael Jackson. But now, well, you know. I guess I'd wish to go to Disney World.
3.) If you had the chance to learn when you were going to die, would you take it? Would you tell anyone if you knew (either your date of death or theirs)?
OK, that's two questions. Um, I would say no, in both cases. Somehow, I think we are better off not knowing.
4.) If you couldn't die until you helped someone, would you rather live forever selfishly or die earlier?
What is this, some sort of morbid bizarro boy scout question? Obviously, I'd help someone and die earlier.
5.) If there's any goal you haven't accomplished yet, what is it and what is stopping you?
Live in or near New York City. I guess just the natural apprehension of making such a big move is stopping me. Being reluctant to take a risk. For now, anyway.
"You're like the warm sunshine. I think of you all the time. I've fallen for you and that's a fact. What do you say to that?"
Not much to blog about today, so I figured, I'd do this. (from The Friday Five)
1.) If you were in a band (you know, a successful one...), and you HAD to remake an old song, what band/song would you choose and why?
I'd remake a Milli Vanilli song, because no one plays them anymore, and maybe they'd play our version, but probably not. What song? Umm, "Blame It On The Rain", cos I can't understand all the words to "Girl You Know It's True."
2.) If you were a Make-a-Wish child, what would you wish for (and why)?
Well, when I was a kid, I wanted to meet Michael Jackson. But now, well, you know. I guess I'd wish to go to Disney World.
3.) If you had the chance to learn when you were going to die, would you take it? Would you tell anyone if you knew (either your date of death or theirs)?
OK, that's two questions. Um, I would say no, in both cases. Somehow, I think we are better off not knowing.
4.) If you couldn't die until you helped someone, would you rather live forever selfishly or die earlier?
What is this, some sort of morbid bizarro boy scout question? Obviously, I'd help someone and die earlier.
5.) If there's any goal you haven't accomplished yet, what is it and what is stopping you?
Live in or near New York City. I guess just the natural apprehension of making such a big move is stopping me. Being reluctant to take a risk. For now, anyway.
"You're like the warm sunshine. I think of you all the time. I've fallen for you and that's a fact. What do you say to that?"
Thursday, February 24, 2005
Boomshakalaka!
The San Antonio/Houston game was on at the steak house last night. K mentioned Sean Elliott. So I said he hasn't played in years, and that he was on the original NBA Jam, along with David Robinson. (I think you know where this is going.) That started me thinking about the original NBA Jam arcade game. I decided to see how many of the original two-man teams I could name. Sure, I could look it up on the internet, but what fun would that be? I'm definitely not sure about all of these. Let me know if you can think of any, or have corrections. Perhaps we can eventually put the "nail in the coffin." Here's what I have thought of so far:
The Original NBA Jam
Atlanta - Dominique Wilkins, Steve Smith?
Boston - Dee Brown, Robert Parish
Charlotte - Larry Johnson, Alonzo Mourning
Chicago - Scottie Pippen, Horace Grant
Cleveland - Mark Price, Brad Daugherty
Dallas - Derek Harper, Jim Jackson
Denver - Dikembe Mutombo?,
Detroit - Bill Laimbeer, Joe Dumars?
Golden State - Chris Mullin, Tim Hardaway?
Houston - Hakeen Olajuwon, Robert Horry?
Indiana - Reggie Miller, Derrick McKey?
LA Clippers - Danny Manning, Ron Harper?
LA Lakers - James Worthy, Vlade Divac
Miami - Harold Miner?, Rony Seikaly?
Milwaukee - Glenn Robinson?, Vin Baker?
Minnesota - Tom Gugliotta?,
New Jersey - Derrick Coleman
New York - Patrick Ewing, John Starks?
Orlando - Nick Anderson,
Philadelphia - Clarence Weatherspoon?
Phoenix - Charles Barkley, Kevin Johnson
Portland - Clyde Drexler, Terry Porter
Sacramento - Mitch Richmond,
San Antonio - Sean Elliott, David Robinson
Seattle - Gary Payton, Shawn Kemp
Utah - John Stockton, Karl Malone
Washington - Harvey Grant?,
"I'm always workin', slavin' every day. Gotta get a break from the same old, same old. I need a chance just to get away. If you could hear me think, this is what I'd say..."
The Original NBA Jam
Atlanta - Dominique Wilkins, Steve Smith?
Boston - Dee Brown, Robert Parish
Charlotte - Larry Johnson, Alonzo Mourning
Chicago - Scottie Pippen, Horace Grant
Cleveland - Mark Price, Brad Daugherty
Dallas - Derek Harper, Jim Jackson
Denver - Dikembe Mutombo?,
Detroit - Bill Laimbeer, Joe Dumars?
Golden State - Chris Mullin, Tim Hardaway?
Houston - Hakeen Olajuwon, Robert Horry?
Indiana - Reggie Miller, Derrick McKey?
LA Clippers - Danny Manning, Ron Harper?
LA Lakers - James Worthy, Vlade Divac
Miami - Harold Miner?, Rony Seikaly?
Milwaukee - Glenn Robinson?, Vin Baker?
Minnesota - Tom Gugliotta?,
New Jersey - Derrick Coleman
New York - Patrick Ewing, John Starks?
Orlando - Nick Anderson,
Philadelphia - Clarence Weatherspoon?
Phoenix - Charles Barkley, Kevin Johnson
Portland - Clyde Drexler, Terry Porter
Sacramento - Mitch Richmond,
San Antonio - Sean Elliott, David Robinson
Seattle - Gary Payton, Shawn Kemp
Utah - John Stockton, Karl Malone
Washington - Harvey Grant?,
"I'm always workin', slavin' every day. Gotta get a break from the same old, same old. I need a chance just to get away. If you could hear me think, this is what I'd say..."
Wednesday, February 23, 2005
Yeah, and I'm Ruben's brother
I just had to share this. This sweet-sounding older lady called work today and I answered. She said, "Yes, my name is blah blah blah. I'm Bo Bice's grandmother." Well, I haven't watched American Idol any this year, but I've listened to radio and read the paper enough to know that Bo Bice is one of the finalists or whatever, and he is originally from Alabama. She went on to say he was gonna be appearing somewhere around here tonight. Anyway, I thought it was an interesting call, if not humorous. (And no, I'm not posting this just so I'll get some extra hits, although I probably will.)
"We took one more trip around the sun, but it was all make-believe in the end. No, I can't say where she is today. I can't remember who I was back then..."
"We took one more trip around the sun, but it was all make-believe in the end. No, I can't say where she is today. I can't remember who I was back then..."
Bone: From 10 to 1
(stolen from Lindsy)
TEN Random Things About Me
1. I have a very hard time telling people no
2. Two of my shining accomplishments are meeting Faith Hill and Allison Fisher
3. I have the same birthday as Abraham Lincoln (different year)
4. I was Spanish Club President in high school, but I don't remember very many words
5. I have mild OCD, a need for symmetry
6. I don't smoke or drink
7. I am a member of the Church of Christ
8. A fabric softener sheet just fell out of my sweatshirt a minute ago in the bathroom
9. I will seriously consider adopting children in five or six years if there are no signs that I might be getting married
10. I tweaked my back several days ago and it has been killing me for the past week
NINE Places I've Visited
1. New York
2. New Orleans, Louisiana
3. Indianapolis, Indiana
4. Dallas, Texas
5. Atlanta, Georgia
6. Memphis, Tennessee
7. Richmond, Virginia
8. Destin, Florida
9. Luckenbach, Texas (thanks, Mom!)
EIGHT Things I Want To Do Before I Die
1. Move to New York
2. Have kids
3. Get up on open mic night at a comedy club
4. Visit London and Paris
5. Work for a charity/non-profit organization
6. See the Reds play in Cincinnati
7. Work in a sports-related job
8. Write something and have it published
SEVEN Ways To Win My Heart
1. Act and speak like a lady
2. Be funny
3. See the good in me
4. Don't drink or smoke
5. Enjoy watching Seinfeld
6. Be honest
7. Be trying to put God first in your life
SIX Things I Believe In
1. The Bible
2. Love
3. Giving
4. Honesty
5. Prayer
6. Helping others
FIVE Things I'm Afraid Of
1. Forever
2. Losing my parents
3. Snakes
4. Having to buy larger than a 33 waist. (I obviously can't think of anymore.)
5. Sleepwalking and hurting myself
FOUR Of My Favorite Items In My Bedroom
1. My bed
2. My computer
3. My burgundy and white Old Navy shirt
4. My Seinfeld tickets!
THREE Things I Do Everyday
1. Pray
2. Get online
3. Shower
TWO Things I Am Trying Not To Do Right Now
1. Fall asleep
2. Rip the phone out of the wall and throw it out the window
ONE Person I Want To See Right Now
1. Allison Fisher
"He went to Paris, looking for answers, to questions that bothered him so. He was impressive, young and aggressive, saving the world on his own..."
TEN Random Things About Me
1. I have a very hard time telling people no
2. Two of my shining accomplishments are meeting Faith Hill and Allison Fisher
3. I have the same birthday as Abraham Lincoln (different year)
4. I was Spanish Club President in high school, but I don't remember very many words
5. I have mild OCD, a need for symmetry
6. I don't smoke or drink
7. I am a member of the Church of Christ
8. A fabric softener sheet just fell out of my sweatshirt a minute ago in the bathroom
9. I will seriously consider adopting children in five or six years if there are no signs that I might be getting married
10. I tweaked my back several days ago and it has been killing me for the past week
NINE Places I've Visited
1. New York
2. New Orleans, Louisiana
3. Indianapolis, Indiana
4. Dallas, Texas
5. Atlanta, Georgia
6. Memphis, Tennessee
7. Richmond, Virginia
8. Destin, Florida
9. Luckenbach, Texas (thanks, Mom!)
EIGHT Things I Want To Do Before I Die
1. Move to New York
2. Have kids
3. Get up on open mic night at a comedy club
4. Visit London and Paris
5. Work for a charity/non-profit organization
6. See the Reds play in Cincinnati
7. Work in a sports-related job
8. Write something and have it published
SEVEN Ways To Win My Heart
1. Act and speak like a lady
2. Be funny
3. See the good in me
4. Don't drink or smoke
5. Enjoy watching Seinfeld
6. Be honest
7. Be trying to put God first in your life
SIX Things I Believe In
1. The Bible
2. Love
3. Giving
4. Honesty
5. Prayer
6. Helping others
FIVE Things I'm Afraid Of
1. Forever
2. Losing my parents
3. Snakes
4. Having to buy larger than a 33 waist. (I obviously can't think of anymore.)
5. Sleepwalking and hurting myself
FOUR Of My Favorite Items In My Bedroom
1. My bed
2. My computer
3. My burgundy and white Old Navy shirt
4. My Seinfeld tickets!
THREE Things I Do Everyday
1. Pray
2. Get online
3. Shower
TWO Things I Am Trying Not To Do Right Now
1. Fall asleep
2. Rip the phone out of the wall and throw it out the window
ONE Person I Want To See Right Now
1. Allison Fisher
"He went to Paris, looking for answers, to questions that bothered him so. He was impressive, young and aggressive, saving the world on his own..."
Tuesday, February 22, 2005
Bachelor, I presume?
I'm not saying I believe in the tooth fairy, but let's just say that I've never had to give a second thought as to how I would properly dispose of any of my teeth.
You can tell a lot about someone by the groceries they buy. Apparently. I posted something similar to this several months ago. (Here, actually.) So I'm at Wal-Mart tonight and when I get to the checkout, the dude is about halfway thru my items and out of the blue, he says, "Bachelor, I presume?" First of all, why can't a cute chick cashier say that to me? Second of all... OK, there is no second of all. I guess my Tony's pizza-for-one and my one cucumber might have given it away. What am I supposed to do, buy in bulk?
This afternoon turned out to be beautiful, so I went running at Wilson Morgan. I think I'm about to cook some supper and watch some basketball.
"It's the simple things in life, like the kids at home and a loving wife, that you miss the most, when you lose control..."
You can tell a lot about someone by the groceries they buy. Apparently. I posted something similar to this several months ago. (Here, actually.) So I'm at Wal-Mart tonight and when I get to the checkout, the dude is about halfway thru my items and out of the blue, he says, "Bachelor, I presume?" First of all, why can't a cute chick cashier say that to me? Second of all... OK, there is no second of all. I guess my Tony's pizza-for-one and my one cucumber might have given it away. What am I supposed to do, buy in bulk?
This afternoon turned out to be beautiful, so I went running at Wilson Morgan. I think I'm about to cook some supper and watch some basketball.
"It's the simple things in life, like the kids at home and a loving wife, that you miss the most, when you lose control..."
Monday, February 21, 2005
Monday Madness
This week, using the letters in your name (real or screen name), list places that you've been to. Be creative! Have fun! =)
B - Battery Park in New York
O - Orange Beach
N - New Orleans
E - East Rutherford, New Jersey
(from Monday Madness)
I was gonna do Human Jukebox, but U and X? No way.
"Please come to Boston for the springtime. I'm stayin' here with some friends and they've got lots of room. You can sell your paintings on the sidewalk, by a cafe where I hope to be workin' soon..."
B - Battery Park in New York
O - Orange Beach
N - New Orleans
E - East Rutherford, New Jersey
(from Monday Madness)
I was gonna do Human Jukebox, but U and X? No way.
"Please come to Boston for the springtime. I'm stayin' here with some friends and they've got lots of room. You can sell your paintings on the sidewalk, by a cafe where I hope to be workin' soon..."
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