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Wednesday, September 14, 2005

A Blerd's Dissertation

This entire blogging thing continues to amaze me, blerd that I am. One of the coolest things to me is the fact that people I have never met read what I have to say, and even offer feedback and comments. And vice versa for the blogs that I read. And so, after awhile, I feel like I do sort of get to know Cindy, and InterstellarLass, and Crys, and OC Girl, and Pia, and Lindsy, and the Blonde, and the Brunette, and JC, and others. In some small way. Perhaps we have a desire to peer into the lives of others. Maybe that is why reality TV is popular.

When I first began blogging, it was mostly just a recap of the events in my life, or lack thereof. I have always expressed myself by writiing, in some form or another, whether anyone was reading or not. Usually not. Blogging has provided another avenue for that. But more and more, this has become a way for me to exercise my writing skills. Or... lack thereof. After all, surely the more one writes, the better one's writing becomes.

Once in awhile, I will read something from my archives. (Still haven't gotten around to a 'favorite posts' section yet.) I think that I was much funnier then. Funny has not come as easy to me lately, for some reason. I need to get that back. Somehow.

I have realized some other things about my writing. Or I think I have anyway. I tend to write about feelings and thoughts and emotions more than I do about physical things. I have a hard time remembering details, such as what clothes someone was wearing. But someone pointed out to me the other night that perhaps that is because I don't really notice such things in the first place. I am more apt to notice that someone is sad or troubled, or remember how someone made me feel, than I am to note what kind of shoes they are wearing. I remember how being on a certain street makes me feel, but I have a hard time recalling any of the stores, cars, or people I may have seen there. I need to work on the details. And so much more.

I have never been able to write fiction, either. Good fiction makes you forget that it is fiction almost from the first line. The two or three times I have attempted to write fiction, it sounded made up. The names sounded made up. It all did. Maybe I could learn to do that one day. I think that I would make a good columnist though. I applied for a job with a newspaper years ago. Didn't get it. But I think that I write much better now anyway.

I would love to be able to make someone feel an emotion simply by reading words that I have written. To bring back a memory. To take them to another place and time. Like all good writers are able to do. The thing is, I have never been very proactive with certain things. And career and relationships are two of those. I tend to let things happen naturally, in those areas at least. For example, I have never been one to really go out just looking for a girlfriend. Yet somehow, they always find me. And I have always been fortunate in that area. For the most part. Same thing with the career. Other than applying with the newspaper. Of course, ninety percent of everything depends on who you know. And I don't know many people.

The bottom line, I suppose, is that I have always wanted to write. Although I have not always admitted that, to myself or others. Maybe it is time that I did. No. On second thought, that is way too scary. I'll just continue to keep that to myself ;-)

Now I think that I am just rambling about some nothingness. Silly, crazy dreams. Maybe every blogger secretly wants to write. I am certain that a good number do. And many of them write much better than me. That, I am also sure of.

So, there you have it. A blog entry... about blogging? How sad is that. Of course, I still hope that you will comment, blerd that I am.

"Do you wanna be a poet and write? Do you wanna be an actor up in lights? Do you wanna be a soldier and fight for love?"

9 comments:

  1. You do indeed have the ability to relay emotion through your words in such a vivid way it moves others.

    Thats why we keep coming back... your fan club o' girls... we can all see it.

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  2. It's ok, Bone, I'm a blerd-who-wants-to-be-a-writer in denial too. You're not alone! :)

    In all sincerity, you're very talented, so if you ever decide not to be in denial anymore I'm sure you'll be very successful. Actually, you don't need to decide to be a writer- you are a writer! Otherwise we wouldn't all read your blog religiously. It *is* strange that we're mostly female, though... Maybe you should try picking up ladies by writing them stuff. :)

    And fiction schmiction- fiction just means splicing together disparate pieces of non-fiction anyway, because you can't write what you don't know. That's a double negative. Perhaps I should stay in denial.

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  3. I remember distinctly sitting at my desk at work with tears running down my face over something you wrote. It was the one about the patch of snow. Give credit where credit is due! You are obviously a sensitive person that feels rather than just sees things. In a man, often times that's rare but very cool!

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  4. "Write what you know." is the mantra of all writing coaches, teachers, manuals etc. Your blog is filled with your experiences and it's personal. Your personality fills every post, whether it's about your trips to TN, nights with the guys at Applebee's and pool, your family, or your audio posts. You are a writer. You're just not getting paid for it yet. I remember back to a post you had written long ago about your ex-fiance and how you remembered your time together. It made me sad, yet also filled with hope that there were other decent guys in the world who cared. I even copy and pasted the post to Dave - wanting him to know that that was what I wanted and needed to hear from him. I don't think he took the bait at that point - some guys are a little slow on the draw. ;-) Oh well.

    Some practical advice: contact your local paper, gazette, weekly events calendar paper and ask if they have any freelance positions or opportunities. Also, pick some magazines that you like and write or contact them about freelance opportunities. Maybe a billiards association or something that you really like? If you have a topic or angle that you know, you're more likely to have fun with it. Just my advice.

    Also, thank you for you nice words about getting to know me through our blogs and comments - I think you're a terrific guy and 'friend who I've never met in person'. :-)

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  5. OCG: So that's the reason, huh? ;-) Thank you.

    Lass: LOL Be careful what you wish for.

    Blonde: That's cool. I love long comments. Thanks for the nice words.

    Tiffany: Yeah, it's kinda nice to go to another place and time once in awhile, isn't it?

    Sarah: Thanks! Very nice to know I'm not alone. Denial is very underrated, I think :-)

    Carnealian: Thank you. Unmelted Snow. OK then, I'm def adding that one to my favorite posts, if I ever get around to doing one.

    Cindy: "I even copy and pasted the post to Dave - wanting him to know that that was what I wanted and needed to hear from him."

    That made me laugh. Go easy on him. Most times I fail to say or express things until it's too late. And thanks for the advice.

    Thanks for the kind words, all!

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  6. Glad you had a laugh. :-)

    Also, you're welcome for the advice - I had hoped you didn't mind it.

    Are you gearing up for tomorrow nights show? Do you have a special guest lined up yet? ;-)

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  7. Didn't mind it at all.

    Yes, we've been discussing the show all week. We do have an idea for a guest and something new for them to do, but not sure if we can get that together this week or not.

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  8. I was never proactive but life has a way of finding me anyway

    Hate to make a bad and obvious pun, but you write to the bone, which is the most important thing about good writing.

    And remembering emotions is so much more important than details.

    Good fiction, I think, is usually real life a bit or a lot disquised.

    I was funnier also. Think it's something in the air.

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  9. The very first time that I was here I read a post that made me feel lots of emotions. That is why I came back. Not only did it make me feel lots of emotions, it actually made me care about you as a person-the very first post I read. I would say that is pretty darned amazing.

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